Every time I have a conversation with or about my family my glucose reading spikes from the stress. Do you think I can convince them all to leave me alone for medical reasons?
Why can’t there be a male hooter’s equivalent where male servers are shirtless and highly sexualized for their bodies and looks
Male Strip clubs. You’re thinking of male strip clubs.
No. Not a male strip club. A strip club is a strip club. I want a place called Cahones where waiters wear Speedos and are forced to stuff if they don’t fill out their uniform well enough. I want them to giggle for my tips. I want it to be so normalised and engrained in our culture that women bring their daughters there for lunch (because whaaaaaat the wings are good! Geeze sensitive much?) where they’ll give playful little nudges like, “Wouldn’t mind if you dad had those. Heh heh heh.” that their daughters don’t even understand but will absorb and start to assume is just the normal way grown up women talk about grown up men. I want to playfully ask my waiter if I can have extra nuts on my salad and for him to swat my arm with an Oh, you because he knows if he doesn’t his manager will yell at him. I want other men to pretend to like going there so I think they’re cool. I want to go to Cahones during my lunch break at work and when I come back and tell the other women in the office where I went they chuckle slightly and the men around us suddenly feel self conscious and they don’t know why.
Well whatever the hell Husband has I certainly don’t want it. He’s been vomming for the last hour. It is super unpleasant.
I made the mistake of having ONE (1) conversation about hallucinogens with this dude at work (to be fair, he brought it up), and now whenever I see him he feels the need to tell me about whatever substance he’s on and/or wants to be on. Ughhhhhh. Totally tedious.
That’s the salad base and here’s the vinaigrette:
I made the following minor changes:
It turned out AWESOME. I made sure to choose a firm, somewhat underripe avocado b/c I didn’t want it getting mushy in the salad. The flavor is light, bright, and perfect for spring. I ate mine over a handful of spring mix greens and with a few bites of chicken thrown in. You could also mix in some plain Greek yogurt or sour cream for a creamy consistency, which I might yet try. Hopefully it won’t have a negative effect on my glucose level. I’d be really sad if it did (I’m thinking the lemon juice would be the culprit) because it’s really, really good. And incredibly easy/cheap.
Oh, awesome. One of my neighbors has a theater-grade sound system and has just decided it’s time to watch what sounds like a documentary on EXTREME RUMBLING BASS AND EXPLOSION SOUNDS or maybe VERY DISRUPTIVE NOISES THAT PREVENT YOUR NEIGHBORS FROM GETTING ANY REST. I can’t tell if it’s coming from The Apartment Of 1000 Dudebros next door, or the folks upstairs. I am considering calling the office tomorrow and asking for them to post a “friendly reminder” about quiet hours.
UGH I KNOW I’M SUCH A TATTLE. But … I’m not going knocking on doors, and if it does involve more than one apartment then a blanket reminder is honestly the best approach, I think.
And you know what? I don’t even care that I’m being kind of wenis about the noise… we all signed leases here, and just as I have to deal with people smoking outside their apartments rather than inside, they’ll have to deal with turning the volume down after 9pm. Them’s the breaks of living in close quarters.